It was a truly sacred weekend. Saturday was just a perfect day - we had a nice road trip to and from the river in Dad's new Subaru. We had some really nice conversations about our favorite things about Mom, and what we miss most about her. There aren't a whole lot of moments I get to spend with Dad and Justin alone, so it was a great opportunity to do so. We also had some really nice moments of closure when we laid Mom to rest on the lake.
Meanwhile, Duncan and Jackson were bonding with their Great Aunt Lisa, Great Uncle Brad and second cousins Drew and Jessica. GGmom and GGdad popped over to their house as well to aid in the babysitting. It was so wonderful to knew they were being well loved and cared for. The boys were troopers, on their best behavior for their babysitters.
Also, I was able to help Dad sort through some of Mom's things at the condo. He is truly doing such a wonderful job taking care of himself and his condo. I am very proud of him! Losing someone like Mom meant for him losing not only a life companion but also a "manager" of the home. Dad has had to deal with the grief process concurrently with the learning process of taking care of all the "stuff" of the home.
My time in Louisville was yet another stage in my own grief process as well. The spreading of Mom's ashes, clearly, was an important time. But the weekend was also one of many more "firsts" to come... the first visit "home" without a mom to welcome me. It will get easier, I feel certain. But I am still feeling the hardhitting reality of what her absence means in Louisvillle even after being back home for a few days. Living out of town and having these miraculous boys to consume my thoughts sometimes hides the reality of my changed life without Mom. Louisville's trip brought it up close and personal.
On a lighter note, I learned that I NEVER want to be a single mom permanently. The responsibility is amazing. "Tipsy" the Town and Country was packed with everything but the kitchen sink for the weekend. And carting those guys around by myself (P.S. - they were AMAZING travelers on thr 3 hours road trip there and back!) made me increasingly thankful that I have a husband as supportive and helpful as I do. So, when you cross paths with a Mom who doesn't have the good fortune of having another set of hands for relief, give her a hug!!
And now for the photo of the week for each boy:
Jackson in his "big boy" chair... the fun orthopedically -ecommended "bumbee." It props him up in a sit-up position, even though he is nowhere close to sitting up by himself. As a result, he looks like SUCH a big boy sitting there, doesn't he? And that sweet little grin seems to communicate, "I got this down! What else ya want me to do?"
Duncan exercising on his tummy. He even has a little grin going too. Look at those defining eyebrows! They are clear reminders that these boys are 50% (or more) Scott Gibson Arthur! His right eye currently has a contact lens in it, which is undetectable unless you were to get up close. What may be noticable in this picture is dilation in that eye as a result of eye drops we have to give him 4 times a day.
FROM LOUISVILLE:
Cousins Drew and Jessica had a blast with the boys. Here's Duncan looking peaceful
And Jackson in Aunt Lisa's arms... notice the CROKS! (thanks Beth and Danny!)
Dad took Justin and I out to a VERY nice restaurant Saturday night to seal that day in our memories. It's the nicest restaurant in Louisville, according to Justin, who is quite familiar with the restaurant business. The boys, yet again, cooperated beautifully!
1 comment:
Tricia,
Wow! What a weekend you must have had. I am amazed you are able to put your thoughts down so perfectly. You are a lucky girl to have a Daddy you can talk to about your Mom. Keep sharing the memories and moments. Love to you, Scott and the boys.
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